Free (Olympic) Tickets For Dummies
Prerequisites:
• Cardboard box
• Dark, preferably black Marker
• Pencil (Necessity dependant on Artistic Integrity)
• Approximately 30min (Dependant on Artistic Integrity)
• Absolutely no shame, a pitiable smile, and strong, or at least durable, arms
Preparation:
• Tear off a sizable chunk of cardboard, bigger the better (but heavier!)
• For neatness in the next step, sketch out the words, “Student Needs Tickets Please” on the cardboard (Dependant on Artistic Integrity)
• Color/black in the sketched out words (or just guesstimate and skip the previous step – not something I’ve been able to do successfully)
• Add local language (Optional)
• Bus/Taxi/Subway to desired venue
• Find entrance
• Find place to stand
• Unfold sign
• Raise sign up in the air
• Look miserable, maybe laugh self consciously now and again, ignore the growing ache in your arms
• Ponder the meaning of life
• Continue holding the sign high up in the air, despite increasingly painful burn in your shoulder region, and possibly the part of your brain that holds Pride
• Ponder the meaning of life further
• Repeatedly tell people that, as you are a student, you. Have. No. Money.
• Get a ticket for free from someone who has an extra, see event, party like a rockstar
o Alternative: if no ticket was obtained, do something else. Like go shopping. Or whatever.
• Wrap funny stories of people you met while holding up your sign like a blanket to ward off the shame of begging
• Realize that it’s actually fun to do it, and try again tomorrow